"...missy, you ok ah?"
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"MEZAMETA KONO NANKAHEN NO SEKAI HE~"
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Nantoka Hen no Monogatari [The Tale of Somewhat-Weird / 何とか変の物語 / 有点奇怪的物语 ] 2015
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[Insert Chapter]
Part Two: First Companion, and One Step Closer...!
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Seriously, what has HAPPENED to me?! First thing that I looked into the mirror wasn't that chubby-sized black haired girl with glasses... BUT A BLONDE BEAUTY WITH... WITH....!!!
KYAT EYARS?!?!?! WAHT KAIND OUF JOUK IZ DIS?!?!?!
Honestly, I never understood the part where I became... a cat-person.
THAT. TAIL.
Anyway, that pair of ears and that tail... there's no mistake that I'm resembling a cat over here. I mean... Monkey doesn't have ears like that, right...?
But... why a cat? Why not a monkey? I mean, even if I became a thief, being a monkey or a rat sounds legit too. What's the requirement? Can this be changed? Or am I already a cat when I- nonono, it cannot be... Because now I have an extreme craving for fish-stuffs and I'm SURE it wasn't like that... or maybe it was??? Ehhhh???
"Nee nee Rei-chan~" Ah, that uke-ful voice.
"Yo Uk- I mean, Kou-ch-kun!" It's so hard to change the way I call him. I'm so used to call her- I mean, him as '-chan' instead of '-kun'. So weird. Nevertheless, Hirasawa Kou is my savior, and my best friend in the real world! Thus, it'll be best not to do anything that'll weird him out - I want to preserve this relationship between us yo! I can't imagine if my best friend starts to shun me uhuuu~ (inner-cries)
Anyway, this Kou, despite all the smooth skin, sparkling face, feminine posture, and that diva-ish aura... is a guy! Yes, you heard that right. This beauty over here is a goddammed DUDE. With a bird bird that I've never seen before... wait, now I'm doubting myself of his gender- NO. I'M VERY SURE HE HAS NO BOOBS. THAT I'M SUPER SURE. HE'S A DUDE ALRIGHT?! And he's definitely taller, though short for a guy.
Now I'm braining again-
But anyway, I'm gonna rant! This is my brain and I'm gonna brain everything I want! This dude, I tell you, no matter how many food you stuff into his mouth, he'll NEVER-
I repeat:
NEVER. EVER. Get fat.
Look at that body! Look at that waist! He's slimmer than ANY girl could wished for. He could eat all the great foods great deserts in the world and YET he can maintain his body without any efforts.
Such perfect aura, perfect posture, perfect... body... (disregard the chest) perfect sound, perfect face, and that style... No doubt even a tomboy would ask him out. Mmhmmm~
"Here's some mushroom salmons~ Wanna try some?" I TOLD YOU. THAT SMILE. IT'S ILLEGAL. I swore that smile can cause people to sin and crime for his smile... He just... randomly do that to people! Imagine all the manly hearts he has broken - DAYM! But seriously, I'm quite worried that one day some bastards will come and kidnap him and OXOXOXOXOXO- wait.
That smell.
MUSHROOM. AND. SALMONS?!!!?!?!?!??!??!!?
"HAIHAIHAI! I want them please~~~" Kou~~~ My buddy, my bestest best best buddy~~~ You're my love and you're my sunshine and you're my moonshine~~~ How did you know what I want right now erhmahgaaaaaawdddddd~~~ "Itadaki!"
Oh. My. BUDDHA!!!!!!!! The mushroom just EXPLODED in my mouth, and the salmon... ohhhh the salmon... it literally just MELTED. They're dancing in my mouth, ohhhh~ Salmons dressed as mushrooms dancing in my-
Actually that's a bad image. Let's erase it.
"Your cooking skill... GODLY!!!" With tears in my eyes, I couldn't stop praising him with "mmm!" and "oooo!" while eating those delicious cuties. Kou's reaction? He stood there proudly, as if his nose just reached the heavens.
"That's of course! My grandma is a great cook, and she's the one who taught me everything! She's the greatest chef in our Hirasawa lineage, second to Hirasawa Ui!"
...wait. What. Hold on a sec-
"H-Hirasawa Ui?!" The younger sister from K-*n?
"Yeap! Hirasawa Ui! You know about her too?!"
"U-Uh, yeah," I mean I DO watch K-*n and that's like our favorite anime of all time. OUR.
"Oh mah gawd! Guuuurl! I'm so proud I'm so proud of you I'm so proud of my ancestor! I mean, I KNEW that she's famous already but hearing this from another person I just couldn't feel any happier than how I am right now blahblahblahblahblah-"
...vat. You're proud of wat. Your ancestor wat.
"-blahblahblah and the other one that I'm proud is Hirasawa Yui! I'm so proud of her too!" ...alright. I'm utterly confused now. "Ui-sama was wanted by soooo many royalties around the world, even the king himself!" Uhuh. This is not the real world. In this world, aaaaanything could happen. "But she declined EVERY single one of them, claiming that she only cook for her sister," Yes yes. That I understood too. "Which is why I think Yui-sama is the greatest, because she's able to keep such a good chef and good sister beside her! Even though it wasn't clear yet, she's actually one of the greatest warrior in the world, too! I'm so proud, because we're elves and it's hard to become a warrior... yet she could!"
Uhuuuuuuuuh. Ok. I... didn't expect THAT to happen. Something must have gone wrong in their family history but EH, what can I say? I don't belong to this world, so... ANYTHING could happen! Yeap. That should be it.
"I see I see~ Your family is certainly great!" I kept the same grin while hiding some possible anime-style sweatdrops and black lines on my face... well, in real life this is not possible, but still - I'm worried.
"By the way, how did you end up like that? Why did you come here?" Oh. Oh no. The hardest question of the century just came.
"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.............................. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell............" It's not like I want to lie but really... What. Should I tell him (with a cute voice) 'I'm just a random NEET that dropped from the sky and entered this world and OH! You're my best buddy in the real world' or (with a chuuni-dramatic voice) 'I am here... TO SAVE THE WORLD!!!"' or (with a haughty princess's voice) 'Ugh! That stupid fairy didn't tell me AAAANYTHING.'
Those were all truths - no lies. Just hidden factors, of course. But if I were to choose? The last one would be the MY answer.
"W-Well... I was... uhhh..." Maybe I'll just tell him how exactly I fall down, perhaps?
Wait.
"MAH BALL!!!" I suddenly exclaimed, remembering the most important thing that made me like... this. "I lost mah ball!"
"Uhhhh... What... ball...?" Okay, Kou, don't give me that look as if I lost my manly balls.
"Nonono, it isn't what you think ok? Look. It's a crystal ball. Crystal. Ball. ...fine. Orb. Get it? O~R~B." I rephrased that word, and he suddenly go "Ooooh!" to me. What. He really thought that I have manrrrrry balls? Ewwwwww. That's the LAST thing I would want, man! I have one huge pair of balls here. I need no extra mini-dangling balls, alright?
And whyyyy did you look like you're so guilty now?
"If you're talking about an orb... well, uh, I've seen it and... erm..." Kou-chuan. What. Did. You. Do? "I sold it."
"...vat."
Silence. Before the storm arrives.
"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?! DO YOU KNOW HOW IMPORTANT THAT BALL IS TO ME?! Ok maybe I don't KNOW how important but IT'S A PLOT DEVICE AND THAT SHITTY FAIRY DIDN'T GIVE ME A SECOND BALL AND NOW WHEN I NEED IT SHE'S FUCKING GONE AND NOW THIS BALL IS GONE HOW DO I ADVANCE THE PLOT RIGHT NOW WHAT THE HELL- wait. How much did you sell- Oh no, do we even have the money to get it back- SHIT! KOU! DID YOU SPEND THEM ALREA-"
Alright. I have no idea what and how I'm feeling right now. At first I'm angry, then I panicked... then when I thought on solving the problem I got more terrified and... and... I stopped when I looked at Kou's face. Eh, he's super guilty. Has he been this guilty? So he KNEW that taking a random thing from the ground and selling it off is something wrong and YET he does it?!
Actually, now come to think about it, it IS a random thing from the ground. If he's an adventurer, this means "loots". If you're a gamer, this is certainly a must-do kind of thing.
Damn.
"I... *sob* I'm sorry... *sob*" Alright, alright. I guess I'm wrong too. It's my fault for losing it in the first place, so, now other people have the rights to pick it up as a loot and sell it... right? Sigh.
"Alright alright. Let's do this... How 'bout you tell me who you sold it to, and we'll figure out how to get it back?" Obviously I toned down, knowing my own mistakes. Still, I'm very sure if I'm not dead yet, this ain't call "looting legally".
"Well... I sold *sob* your ball to the richest man in this city *sob* so that *sob* he won't bother me *sob* again...!" Uhuh... It seemed that there's some dramas going on here eh? I wonder how my ball is going to help him...
"That greedy man has been harassing me and my family, saying that he will buy over our restaurant and will do ANYTHING to make that happen! This restaurant is our family's treasure, we can't give up on this!" Kou was agitated, and desperate for help. Huh. That's rare. Now I get why he's desperate to sell it. "He did SO MANY, he even threatened us with this land of ours! Our home!" Wait. The fuck?! "He said if we don't let him have the restaurant, he'll buy this off... and he did, and we end up paying him rental fees because we're reluctant in selling the restaurant off! But now... he... he... He pulled off customers to worsen our situations, and... if it's not because of the orb, we... we might really..."
Dude.
Duuuuuuuuuude.
This bastard. He's gonna get it from me. How could he do these kind of shitty things to my best friend and savior?! Plus, if I know that my orb could sell a huge bucks to help him in this way, I think it'll definitely worth it. Yes, this reason is super legit. But still, I can't lose this orb like this...
"I'm so sorry Rei-chan! I really... don't mean to! I... I...!"
"No worries!" Cutting him off, I grabbed onto his shoulder. "I forgive you," Ah, I see his face suddenly filled with lights. "And I'm gonna help you on this one! Let's go and crush him down and get the orb back at the same time!"
"R-Really...?! But I...!"
"Daaaaaaaaaijoubu da yo!" I grinned at him, while my mind was now running on a few scenarios onto how to wreck a person's life. "You saved my life, and it's my turn to repay you!"
"Arigato! Arigato Rei-chan!" He took my hands, looking at me with full of gratitude.
"Domo~" I smiled... before it turned into a wicked giggle.
"I shall rip his balls out... and get my ball back!"
= = = = = = = = = = = =
"T-T-This... This is..." I felt my eyes twitched as I saw what I saw...
HUMONGOUS DONGOUS...GIGANTIC...HOUSE OF THE RICHES!!!!!!!
Seriously, I bet this is even LARGER than Tomoyo's mansion! Or even Tsumugi's mansion! Really, I would WANT to meet with that rich, greedy dude SOON!
"H-Hai..." Kou seemed to be scared...somehow. I mean, you're facing the one that threatened you, won't you be scared as well? But he's a man... Hmmm. This means that this dude should be some very scary man, eh...?
"Okay, l-let's...go...!" I muster all my courage (I tried) and take the fiiiiiiiiirst step... And another heavy step... aaaaaaand another heavy step......
...what is WRONG with this atmosphere?! Dammit, I came here to help, not to back off like a coward DAMMIT!!!
Silently I cursed, but it didn't really changed the fact that I'm getting much nervous than Kou. Though I said that I would help him, but that's all just talks... I didn't plan it out! Gah. What the HECK am I doing?! And we should make an appointment with the man first...
...wait.
"SORE DA [THAT'S IT]!!!" I suddenly called out, shocking Kou into a jump.
"N-Nani yo sono totsuzen [W-What's with the sudden]?!"
"Kou-chan! Let us make an appointment with the greedy man! Then..." I added a wicked laugh into the last phrase, but Kou didn't seemed to get it well.
"...Rei-chan no imi chotto wakannai...[I don't really understand Rei-chan's words]"
= = = = = = = = = = = =
"So... Who's this 'buyer' that you promised, my dear Kou?" Huh, this... wasn't what I'm expecting at all. Instead of a big fat old man that looked like a Hentai, this... This is a Young MAN! Dressed in whole blue, tall and strong body with a handsome, foreign-kind of face... whom EXACTLY looked like some certain head-prefect of my high school who's obsessed with my best friend. That... Blow-Jo---
Whoops. Wrong nick name.
Anyway, if he IS what I still remember he is, this will be easier that I thought it would be...
"Hello, mister... BJ," I kept the smile of politeness on my face, stretching out a hand for a shake. I shouldn't be humble like how I used to treat strangers... this time, I need to keep my head up high, so that I can talk to this man as an equal.
"Hello miss, how may I address you?" He took my hand for a shake. Hmph, it is BJ after all... being friendly and polite and, of course, maintaining his image. But... what's up with that 'greedy' attitude? That's not like him at all...
"E-erm..." Kou is suuuuuure nervous. Well, I can see how his situation is... even during our school days, BJ's like... everywhere.
"Rei would be fine," I continued the smile, then took our seats in this restaurant. This restaurant belonged to Kou's family - the Hirasawa family - and possibly passed down by Yui and Ui too... damn. Even though they're anime characters, I can't help but feel the anger if someone were to mess up with the Hirasawa too...! Seriously, BJ, if you don't give me a good reason why you're doing this, I'm going to make you pay...!
"So, you're the buyer for this orb?" BJ grinned towards me. Hmmm, it sure doesn't look friendly to me... I guess he wouldn't give it up easily, or rather, he's trying to keep Kou with that orb... if I'm correct.
"Before that, may I ask mister Hirasawa to leave us alone for a moment?" I spoke up, trying to get some... err... 'private conversation' with BJ. After all, it's something that Kou might NOT wanna hear.
"H-Hai...!" Kou, still with his confused face, walked off and left us alone. Good. Now with the uke out from this, I think I can make a deal with him... with some words.
I hope.
= = = = = = = = = = = =
"I... I don't understand...! They told me that I can get him by doing this!" Yeah right, you're only getting further and further from him! I bet those people are the ones that want you to get away from him instead!
"Have you ever thought whyyyy he avoided you, or disliked you?" I sighed. How can this man be such... 'short-sighted'? Or 'long-sighted'? Whatever.
"I... I... I didn't...!" He seemed to be in a deeeeep trouble. Ok. I guess I felt a bit pity towards him...?
"Look, I'll give you some good advice... don't be so down, ok?"
"Y-You will?"
"Of course! Now, listen..."
= = = = = = = = = = = =
[Third Person POV]
From afar, Kou was actually looking at them, talking.
First, they talked like normal people, with barriers between each other. Then, he noticed Rei whispered something softly into BJ's ears, and watched how BJ widened his eyes. The thief smirked after she withdrawn from BJ, but only for a moment (probably BJ couldn't notice it). To Kou, however, it was obvious.
Suddenly, the rich man began to depress. The two of them suddenly speak to each other as if they're equals and... what on earth?! BJ is SAD and troubled! And Rei was actually comforting him! That's... That's really something that the chef would never thought happening. The elf could only blink in surprise, seeing how the female dealt with the guy that has been harassing him for years.
Then, they ended up shaking hands with each other.
How did this happened? Dear mister uke-face here shall never knew, since Rei kept her mouth shut after this incident was over.
= = = = = = = = = = = =
[Back to First Person POV]
Hmhmhmmm~ Good work, Akir--- Iya chigau. Tainaka Rei! You have successfully finished the mission! Now, time to get the ball back...
"Thank you Miss Rei, I appreciate your supports," BJ smiled as we stood up for a shake, then prompted to take out a small pouch. "And as a gratitude, I would like you to have this."
"Wait. Have this as in...?"
"Yes, I am giving this out. For free," He smiled. "This has not much value to me in the first place anyway... and since this was originally yours."
"I... Thank you," I thanked him sincerely, of course, and took back the crystal orb. Oho~ There's not a single scratch here! He must have taken care of this orb pretty nicely... Perhaps treat this as a key of romance with Kou, I suppose...?
Ah yes, time to call Kou back.
"S-So... How was it...?" Kou looked at me, then at him with that pair of little-animal-eyes... as if he's saying 'Please don't eat me!'
Damn, that itself is...
"Ehem."
"O-Oh!" BJ came back into reality. He coughed, and smiled at Kou. "We have come into a conclusion that I shall free your restaurant, for now."
"R-R-R-Really?! I-I mean, I'm not saying that you might lie to me but... Really?!"
"Yes, it's true, my dear Kou," BJ smiled with his full charm but... it seemed that Kou didn't pay attention to that after the 'true'.
"...h...hhh...HURRAY!!!!!!" UWOH! He screamed! Like a gurl! And hugged me! Whuuuut?!
Ok, now now now, BJ, as you can see, he's utterly happy. That's all. And I'm the awkward one here! I mean, come on! I have never hugged or being hugged before! Not in real life, dammit!!!
"Yo...katta...yo ne...?"
"HAI! ARIGATOU, REI-CHAN!!!"
"Erm..." BJ made some sound. It's a cue for me to get Kou off from me before jealousy strikes me.
"Hai hai hai, stop being so fuwa fuwa and let go of me?"
"Ehhhh~ Ii jan~ Nakama dakara, ne <3"
...why do I sense a 'love sign'...? And why the love sign...? Ugh. Never mind. I should advert my focus towards my... crystal... ball... eh?
An arrow?!
W...What is this...? I-It wasn't here before... and it's pointing at...
KOU?!?!?!!?
W-W-What?!
I looked at him, and he looked at me... wait.
"Please don't make that I-don't-know-what-you're-doing cat-like face. It's not moe against me, and don't get me in trouble, okay?" I half-smiled with an annoyed face. I can't tell Kou about my "deal" with BJ but... I definitely do not want this Tennen Boke to spoil all the efforts that I have done... and I certainly do not want Critical Mission Failure.
"Cheh, shichurei na..." He pouted. Ah, the usual Hirasawa Yui speaking style.
"Well, perhaps we should be going," I smirked, and shake hands with BJ once again before we leave. "We shall meet again."
"Yes," BJ nodded. "Hope to see you again."
"Let's go kuma," I dragged Kou back to the Bat-Cav--- I mean, his lil' restaurant.
= = = = = = = = = = = =
"Ok, listen," I looked at Kou with a serious face... at least I think my face looked serious enough. "I know this is crazy, and we've just met or anything..."
"...so call you maybe?"
"No, Kou," I facepalmed. "Look, this..." I showed with the crystal ball. "This is not just any orbs... A fairy gave me this orb and tell me that this will lead me to my companions."
"Oooooooooooooooh~~~ Shiny~~~ There's an arrow here~"
"...as you can see, the arrow is pointing at you..."
"Arrow-san~ Did you got trapped inside~"
"...it means that you're my companion."
"Arrow-san~ Why are you looking at me--- EHHHHHH!??!?!"
"..."
"..."
Ok. I'm not quite sure if I should believe in this orb but... if there's a possiblity that I can tri--- *cough* I mean, persuade a chef into my 'team', it would be best...right? I mean, even though he might not have any combat skills, well, at least, I won't get hungry... right?
Wait. But what about his family? Damn. I just got his restaurant and my orb back, and I totally forgot about that! Sigh. It would make sense right now if he chose his family over me-
"OKAY!"
"HEH?!"
"I shall go with you!" He beamed towards me, grasping both of my hands with... SHINING EYES?!?!?!?
"E-Erm... Y-You know it's ok if you don't want to go... I mean, I understand it so-"
"Of course! You saved my family's restaurant, and my family themselves! Now it's my turn to repay you!" He beamed once more... are you sure he's just being a Tennen-Boke, or he's really bored about this place and want to go for an adventure with me...?
"O......kay......" I blinked for a few times, before a thought came into my mind. "Wait. Are you ok to leave that to your siblings?"
"..."
"..."
Another silence.
Sigh. I really don't want to force him onto this. After all, even though this might be just a fake world, I really still care about my best friend over here. And I doubt any of those two knew how to cook so...
"Look, Kou, if you don't want to you can just-"
"Oh shut up!" Ah! Again with his diva-side! "I've decided to go with you, and I shall! Besides, they're already adults, they can take care of themselves, right?"
I blinked, before I smirked. Well, when he said that, nothing can change his mind anymore. "Okay then! We're going to be the best duo in this world!"
I clenched my fist, and pump it up to the air. He stood beside me, and did the same.
"OHHHH! ONE STEP CLOSER AS SUPER COMEDIANS!!!"
"OHHHH! ONE STEP CLOSER AS--- EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH??!?!?!?"
"Eheheh~ Joudan da yo jooooudan~"
"...you never change," I gave him an annoyed look, before the both of us broke out into a mad laughter. We watched the sky slowly turning red...
And the dawn was here.
"...First companion, and one step closer into reaching the end...!"
= = = = = = = = = = = =
Next Chapter Preview:
"Sebastian..." A long black haired beauty looked at the handsome man in front of her, full with emotions that she couldn't explain.
"Hime..." The handsome man whispered out the name softly, looking at the beauty in front of him with the same intensity.
".......nani ya, korya...?" Kou and I could only looked at the scene in front of us slowly unfold... and wonder if we should leave them alone...
Next On: Part Three - DOKI DOKI! ROMANCE?!
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